12 March 2011
"What if he's changed?" we all think it, whether it's wondering if they're still going to love us when they get home, to if they're even going to remember us when they leave. Regardless, in reality it's quite preposterous. (Great wordage, I know)
The answer is, he WILL change. And so will you. Going in to this, you have to accept that you're both going to grow int he twelve months (or other amount of time) that he's (or she) is gone. To think otherwise would be absurd. You can't stop it, you can't control it and there's honestly no point in trying. Accept and embrace it.
While he's gone, get to know him all over again. Ask him the same questions you did when you met. Ask him how is day is every day, and never question his love for you. This is one time in your life where you can't afford to be insecure.
There's no way in hell you can think about loving him any less, so ask yourself why it would be any different for him. He needs you, and he needs you to be strong and sure of yourself.
Allow yourself to change. It's going to happen, and you can't fight it the entire time. You need to take this time in your life to figure out EXACTLY who YOU are and hold on to it. Learn how to be independent. Lord know, in the military you're going to have to get used to it. Find out what makes YOU happy apart from HIM. In the long run it will make the two of you stronger upon his return, as the constant push and pull of post deployment is the inability to respect the others' space.Change isn't anything that any of use need to be afraid of, because frankly it's a waste of time . there's nothing you can do to prevent it, or prepare for it, so just go with it. You're going to like who your are, and when you like who you are, it's easier to love someone else for who they are. And in getting to know your loved one all over again, you may find something new to love.